Online couples therapy across Ontario
Couples therapy in Ontario for conflict, intimacy, and repair.
The same fight keeps returning. One of you reaches while the other pulls away. Sex has become tense, distant, or difficult to discuss. Or you still love each other and want support before the relationship reaches a crisis.
I’m Kai DeMaeyer, a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying) working with couples who want to understand what keeps happening between them. My approach is relational, narrative, Gottman-informed, EFT-informed, and grounded in integrative sex and couples therapy.
- Couples + relationships
- Virtual across Ontario
- $140 per 50 minutes
- Free 15-minute consult
- Sliding scale after consultation
This might sound familiar
You care about each other. The pattern is still hurting.
The same argument keeps finding you.
The topic changes, but the positions stay familiar: criticism, defensiveness, escalation, shutdown, pursuit, distance, and another repair attempt that misses.
You can manage life together, but connection has thinned out.
Logistics get handled. Work gets done. The relationship receives whatever energy remains, and conversations about it feel awkward, loaded, or overdue.
Sex or affection carries pressure now.
Desire differences, avoidance, anxiety, resentment, body changes, shame, pain, or repeated rejection may be shaping how closeness feels.
Trust has been damaged.
A rupture, secrecy, betrayal, broken agreement, or long period of disconnection has left both of you unsure what repair would require.
You want to act before resentment hardens.
The relationship may be loving and fundamentally strong. You want better conversations, clearer agreements, or support through a change before the strain becomes a crisis.
Conflict + communication
Slow the cycle before it takes over.
Couples rarely need one more rule about communicating. They need enough space to see how the cycle gathers speed, what each person is protecting, and why attempts to reconnect keep landing badly.
- Recurring arguments, escalation, and shutdown
- Pursuit, withdrawal, criticism, and defensiveness
- Repair attempts, accountability, and trust
- Different communication and processing styles
- Resentment, invisible labour, roles, and power
Intimacy + relationship change
Talk about the parts that have become difficult to approach.
Intimacy reflects far more than attraction. Stress, history, health, identity, pressure, conflict, safety, novelty, grief, and the structure of the relationship can all shape desire and connection.
- Desire differences, avoidance, and sexual anxiety
- Affection, initiation, rejection, and pressure
- Different identities, agreements, and relationship structures
- Kink, boundaries, agreements, and relationship design
- Identity shifts, grief, illness, caregiving, and major transitions
More than communication tips
Communication is the visible layer.
The way partners speak to each other is shaped by attachment, nervous systems, identity, sex, family histories, trauma, work, health, culture, power, and the conditions surrounding the relationship.
We map what happens between you.
Narrative, Gottman-informed, and EFT-informed work helps us identify the cycle, the meanings underneath it, and the bids for care that become difficult to recognize once conflict gathers speed.
We include the context.
Identity, neurodivergence, culture, sex, health, grief, money, caregiving, family pressure, and burnout remain part of the relationship picture rather than being treated as side issues.
We work with the live interaction.
Therapy gives us a place to slow down real conversations, notice turning points, practise clearer requests, build repair, and develop language that both partners can actually use.
We hold acceptance and change together.
Compassion helps partners understand how the pattern formed. Concrete changes help the relationship stop repeating it. Both belong in the work.
The relationship does not need to be in crisis for therapy to be useful.
Book Your Free ConsultWorking together
What happens after you book.
Start with a free consult
We briefly discuss what brings you in, what you are hoping for, scheduling, and whether my approach feels like a useful fit.
Build the relationship map
We look at the concern, the repeating cycle, each partner’s experience, the relationship history, strengths, and current pressures.
Practise in the room
We slow down difficult moments, strengthen repair, build clearer language, and work with emotional and sexual conversations directly.
Carry change into daily life
We develop concrete ways to interrupt the cycle, respond differently, reconnect, and make decisions about what the relationship needs next.
Common questions
Before you reach out.
Does our relationship need to be in crisis?
No. Couples therapy can be preventative. Partners often come in to improve communication, deepen intimacy, prepare for a transition, discuss recurring tension, or build a more intentional relationship. Therapy can also support couples in active conflict or after a rupture.
Is your practice inclusive?
Yes. I work with couples across identities and relationship structures. The work is shaped around your actual relationship, values, context, and the agreements you are trying to build together.
Can couples therapy include sex and intimacy?
Yes. Sex and intimacy can be central to the work or one part of a wider relationship concern. We can discuss desire differences, avoidance, anxiety, shame, initiation, body changes, pain, kink, boundaries, pleasure, trust, and emotional closeness.
What if one partner is unsure about therapy?
Ambivalence is welcome in the room. Both partners can have different hopes, concerns, and levels of confidence about therapy. The free consultation offers a low-pressure place to ask questions and decide whether the approach feels workable for both of you.
Do you work with ENM or polyamorous relationships?
Yes. My practice is ENM and polyamory-informed. Therapy can include agreements, jealousy, boundaries, disclosure, trust, repair, communication, power, transitions, and relationship structures that require something more useful than default scripts.
Is therapy virtual?
Yes. Couples sessions are offered virtually across Ontario. Partners can join from the same private space or from separate private locations within Ontario.
Start the conversation
Bring the conversation you keep getting stuck in.
A free 15-minute consultation gives both partners a chance to meet me, ask questions, and see whether this feels like the right place to do the work.
Book Your Free Consult